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it's got it's own gravity
So I got my financial aid "award" today. As the quotation marks make obvious, I am NOT happy. I'm getting about $20,000 - enough to cover all of my expenses, but it's ALL in loans. Since I'm not living on campus, I technically only need about $10,000 - $11,000, which is great since they'd let me pocket the leftovers. However, my mom will have to pay all of it back! So I feel like I'm getting no financial aid. We still have to pay the FULL amount of tuition and other fees to WWU, we just have to pay it in a couple years. Oh, and we actually get to pay a lot MORE because of interest. So technically I'm getting nothing. Just a postponement. I am so pissed. I got a freaking 4.0 GPA last quarter, and my cumulative GPA is 3.76. I've never gotten below a B in college. What does it take to get a scholarship? Awesome grades? Check. Being on the President's List and the top 10% of your class for grades? Check. DESPERATE financial need? Freaking check.
I don't mean to sound bratty or ungrateful, but you know what? I don't feel like there's anything to be grateful for. I'm not getting anything. We're actually getting screwed over instead, since the interest will have us paying it off for years and in a much huger sum than WWU actually charges. This is like financial aid for the government, not for me.
I don't mean to be dramatic either. But I want to freaking cry. We don't have the money for this, we have enough on our plates as it is and I don't get why they couldn't give me a break. I don't get what it takes to get scholarships or grants if I don't qualify for them currently. I'm assuming they went to all the athletic people with mediocre GPAs who don't deserve it at all.
The way things are going, I have one year left at WWU to complete my nursing pre-requisites, then two years at Seattle University to get my Bachelor's in Nursing. So that's $40,000 in loans due from WWU, then about $80,000 to Seattle University if they give me only loans as well. So $120,000 to pay back, plus interest. In ten years. While my sister is going to college, and presumably getting loans to add on to mine. This is BULLSHIT.
It's such a shitty win-lose (not in our favor) situation that I considered dropping out. I could do the medical assisting program at WCC, at a much cheaper cost, and get a job in that field to pay for an Associate's in nursing to become an RN. Not as good as a BSN, but I'd have the same job title. It'd be much cheaper in the long run as a pro. Cons? I'd be a nurse in three years instead of two. I'd be disappointed in myself for not having a Bachelor's at least. We'd still have $20,000 to pay back in loans for my first year in college, and we'd have to start paying it back now since I wouldn't be at a university anymore. Maybe this isn't a good solution - my mom says to just take the financial aid and get my BSN and we'll worry about it later. But it's kinda hard to do that when we're both up to our eyeballs in expenses we can barely pay for now.
Sorry if this is too personal, I just needed to vent. I hope I didn't make anyone uncomfortable and no one has to respond if they don't want.
So, does anyone have $120,000 they want to give me? Or possibly make me a shoe-in to win the mega million lottery? Sigh.
Donate to the Dr. Andrew Bagby and Zachary Bagby Scholarship Funds
Write in support of bail reform and "Zachary's Bill"
So as I'm sure you're all aware, today is July 25th, 2010. The importance of this date is: my BFF Sam's 21st birthday! This birthday of hers is especially important not because she can now legally drink, but because she has elected to "give up" her birthday in the form of a Charity: Water birthday campaign. She never expects birthday gifts normally, but this year, whenever anyone asks her what she wants, she asks for a donation to her campaign. So, her family members that would normally be getting her a gift or money are now donating to her campaign. I think we can all admire her generosity and try to take a leaf out of her book - I know I want money for my birthday, so I admire her willingness to give hers up.
Anyway, as today is Sam's birthday, that means there are only two days left until the campaign ends on the 27th. Only TWO days left to donate to this very worthwhile cause - and it's easy to donate. Just go to the link I provide in my posts, and will include again at the bottom of this one. The website will direct you. As for security issues, you can feel free to email me or explore the Charity: Water website to appease you if you're feeling nervous. But seriously guys - please donate. It helps people in developing countries get clean water. Normally these people have to walk miles and miles (when rape and/or beatings are likely on the way) to get to water that isn't even clean. This campaign money goes toward providing clean water closer to where these people live.
Every little bit helps, and she only needs $210 more to reach her goal! Please help her make this birthday really really worthwhile.
Happy birthday, Sam!
Sam's 21st Birthday Campaign for Charity: Water - only two days left!!!!
So the other morning I woke up because one of my neighbors was having such a loud conversation that it drifted through my open window (it was over 90 degrees outside!). The conversation was his discussion with his friend about the UFOs currently hovering over Russia. I couldn't decide whether or not to laugh or go kill him for waking me up with such a conversation. What a dilemma! Although I am sure he would be very upset with me for belittling his oh-so-intellectual-and-important discussion - apparently his friend was way behind the times and just HAD to be informed right away. And it had to take place in his front lawn, in the morning, and at a volume that would wake up the neighbors - presumably so that all of us other skeptics could benefit from his knowledge.
On the upside, I did laugh a little bit. An irritated laugh, but a laugh nonetheless. Then I slammed my window shut and started swearing under my breath. :p
At least I now have a story to add to the mix when my mom brings up "funny conversations you've only heard part of and wonder what the hell the people are talking about" topics. She's got some pretty good ones. My BFF Sam cracked me up a few years back telling me about a conversation snippet she overheard where a guy said "Having sex with your clone is basically just masturbation." I mean, I suppose I agree, but - how do these conversations start? Interesting.
Anyone else have any good ones like that?
Sam's Charity: Water Campaign - please donate, only 13 days left!
Write in support of bail reform and Zachary's Bill
Donate to the Dr. Andrew Bagby and Zachary Bagby Memorial Scholarship Funds
Sorry it's been so long everyone...the stupid server was down for awhile. Luckily Timm got it back up for me. Thanks, Timm!
Well obviously a lot's happened, since I haven't blogged since before school was out, which was nearly a month ago. Where to begin...
KC and Courtney's graduation was nice. :) Their graduation had better ceremonial stuff that mine and James' did, so it was nice that it was bearable to sit through, unlike ours. We all went out to eat afterwards and we got to spend a few hours with Denise and Jason, yay! Also the next day, us girls all went and got pedicures together, which was nice and relaxing. It's good to get pampered every once in awhile.
Then we left for Disneyland, which was, of course, a blast. It wasn't too crowded the first couple days but, strangely, it got more crowded during the week. Weird. But we still had tons of fun - we watched the fireworks show, Fantasmic, and, best of all, the new water show called World of Color. It was absolutely gorgeous. If any of you are visiting Southern California anytime soon, I insist that you get a one-day pass to California Adventure and watch World of Color. It's a huge water show, where they put film clips on the water and play music and there's all kinds of color and lights and even fire at one point. It was absolutely spectacular. But anyway, the whole trip was wonderful. We all had a lot of fun together and it was nice for us to take a family trip. It was a great way to kick off the summer - definitely one of my best Disneyland trips ever. I also got myself this really awesome wallet. It's SO cute. It's black and it has "Disneyland" written across it in character print, and it's black and a tri-fold. I love it.
We haven't been up to much since we've been back, mostly just looking for jobs. I have an interview this Tuesday so I'm hoping it goes well. But, in important news, James and I got a kitten! Well, I got it for him as a belated birthday present. He's adorable. He's all black and tiny and James named him Charcoal. He is very, very fiesty. He plays quite a bit and rolls around and nips at fingers, but he's super sweet and adorable. Hopefully he doesn't have too hard a time when we move up to our apartment and he has to adjust to a whole new place.
In other news, I have been moved and, I suspect, changed forever. I recently read a book called Dance With the Devil by the admirable David Bagby. I then watched the documentary on the same case that Mr. Bagby wrote about called Dear Zachary. If you haven't heard this incredible, but heartbreaking, story then I urge you to at least watch the documentary. I warn you, though - you'll be in a rage by the time it's over. But I think it's important for everyone to watch it. We should feel that anger - that's how reforms happen. In short - Mr. Bagby's son was murdered by his girlfriend, who announced after the murder that she was pregnant with Dr. Bagby's (Mr. Bagby's son) baby. There is an ensuing extradition battle (the murderer fled to Canada) as well as a custody squabble. The mess that ensues is heartbreaking. Seriously, watch it. Better yet, read Mr. Bagby's book. I have never, in all my life, seen such strength. I admire Mr. and Mrs. Bagby more than I could ever express. The fact that they are still breathing, and pushing for change, inspires me, because I can not imagine the horrible pain they must feel everyday. But, they do continue to live, and they have dedicated themselves to reforming the system that failed them and their family so terribly. They have also started many groups designed to help cope with grief, AND there are two scholarship funds dedicated to Dr. Bagby and his son, Zachary.
Watch the documentary and read Mr. Bagby's book. I promise you'll want to help afterwards. After you've caught up with the story, please write to the Attorney General of Canada in support of bail reform. It's a very worthy cause and it won't take up any of your time or money. I will post the link at the bottom of this page.
And, in addition to that, if you're feeling generous - please donate to the two scholarship funds. What happened to these people is an atrocity and the fact that they are still trying to help others succeed is very admirable. I feel like helping is the least we can do. Again, the link will be at the bottom of this page.
One more time: Watch Dear Zachary, read Dance With the Devil. I'll get off my soapbox now.
Annnnd, a reminder, (as if I don't ask enough), my BFF Samantha's Charity: Water campaign has less than a month left. Please, please donate - even if only a little. It's a very worthy cause. I have a post dedicated to it a few posts down called "Charity: Water" if you have any questions, or you could always email me at sierraphares@yahoo.com with any other questions I haven't answered.
Have a safe and Happy 4th of July, everyone! Also, my beloved dad's birthday was yesterday, July 2nd. He would've been 42 - a very important landmark for a sci-fi geek like him (I will be disappointed in anyone who doesn't know why!) I love you, Daddy. I hope you had a very happy birthday.
Sam's Charity: Water campaign - only 24 days left!
Write in support of bail reform!
Donate to the Andrew Bagby Scholarship Funds
Well, as you can probably tell from my subject line, there are only 3 DAYS left of school! We get to go home on Thursday and watch my dear cousins KC and Courtney graduate. Congratulations KC and Courtney, and I expect to see prom pictures soon. :)
So my mom, Timm, Sandra, and my sister came up here on Saturday and took pretty much all of our stuff back down. The only things we still have here are our laptops, clothes to last until Thursday, and bedding. It's weird seeing my room so bare. We had a lot of fun when they were up here though - we went to the Farmer's Market (way cooler than the one in Port Orchard) and then we went to the mall for awhile. It was so nice to see them and it was awesome of them to come up and get our stuff so we won't be miserable moving it all on Thursday. Then, Sunday, I went on a massive cleaning spree in my room. I cleaned pretty much every surface, vacuumed, swept, etc. Then today, I moved my bed back down. The bed is positioned like a foot off the floor when you first move in, but I didn't like that, so I checked out some bed parts and moved it up. Today I moved it back down. Well, I didn't really do it, James did it for me and I helped hold up the bars while he was screwing them in, haha. But anyway, my room looks pretty much exactly like it did when I moved in except for my stray stuff laying around. So exciting! I can't wait to go home.
I have one final tomorrow, one on Wednesday, and one Thursday morning. I'm not even nervous for them because at this point it's just hard to care - when I know I'm home for the summer in three days and I get to go to Disneyland this Saturday! I'll study, obviously, but I'm so beyond caring that I can't even be nervous, haha. Not a very good work ethic at the end of the school year. ;)
We also did something else important today. We applied for this AWESOME apartment in Bellingham right by WWU and we got approved last week, so today we went and signed our lease. We're super excited. The manager we always talk to is super nice and helpful, the complex has fantastic reviews online, and the rent is way cheaper there than the other place we were looking at, even though the apartment is nicer, it's in a better location, and we pay the same electricity and cable and internet. So, James and I officially have a place to live this September, and we live together. Yay! It's going to feel so weird though - too grown-up, haha. I dunno. The idea of shopping for our own groceries is totally bizarre, but in a good way. Another awesome thing about the apartment? Even though our lease starts July 1st, since we won't actually be living there until the end of September she's only charging us half-rent until we move in! It was so nice of her, especially since this was our first-choice place and we were desperate to move in and she doesn't pre-lease. I just can't say enough good things about her or the apartment!
Other sidenotes: Relay for Life is in 4 days, and we could always use more members or donations. It's a really awesome event, a great charity, and the Luminaria Ceremony at night is very touching. At least consider it. :) Also - my friend Sam's birthday campaign for Charity: Water now has less than two months left to go. The end date is July 27th. That's also a really great cause to donate to. Feel free to ask me any questions about it if you have any. I'll include the links to the Relay for Life team and Sam's Charity: Water campaign at the bottom of this post.
Well, I better get studying. Have a great week you guys, and for those of you who are graduating, have a great LAST week. Woo hoo!
2010 Relay for Life team
Sam's Charity: Water birthday campaign
James' birthday sure was fun. We woke up and I went and bought him donuts for breakfast, and since I didn't have a cake for him we put candles in one of the donuts for him to blow out, haha. Then I gave him his birthday card, and inside I told him what his present was: a kitten! I'm going to get him a kitten when we get back from Disneyland, then we're going to be taking it with us back up to Bellingham when we come back to WWU in the fall. He was so excited, it was adorable. We went to PetSmart and he picked out stuff for his kitten too. He was going to get his tattoo but they didn't have an opening, so now he's just going to wait until my mom comes up next week. Then we had dinner at the Spaghetti Factory in Vancouver, Canada. James had a beer. He didn't even get carded, it was funny. Also - isn't it funny how, even if you're just going to Vancouver for freaking dinner, the border crossing people make you feel like you're doing something wrong? I hate having to talk to them, they always look at you like you're scum. Anyway, all in all, I think James had a good birthday. :) And this summer he'll get his kitten and I'll bake him his cake! He also pre-ordered Halo Reach with some of the birthday money his mom sent him and he's really excited about that.
So today is Wednesday, May 26th, which means...school is 15 days away from being over! Two weeks from tomorrow I'll be home! I only have 4 days of actual school left, and 3 days where I have finals after that. Yay! I can't wait. Then, two days after we get home, my mom, Maddie, James and I leave for good old Disneyland for almost a week. I couldn't possibly be more excited. :)
So I registered for my fall quarter classes yesterday and I got all the ones I want, thank God. It's normally a toss-up. Luckily now we're higher up on the priority list since new freshman are coming in. James got the ones he was hoping for with one exception, and he's on the wait list for that one - and he has three months to get into the class, so I don't think he has much to worry about.
This weather has me totally out of whack. It's so dark and gray and rainy that it feels just like winter/December to me. It messes up my internal clock and makes me forget I'm almost on summer break - it feels more right to be almost on winter break, haha. It makes me wish for Christmas already! It needs to get sunny so I can try to get into summer mode. I hate feeling all out of sync/messed up. Especially since this weather makes me just want to lay in bed and veg out and watch TV! Also I have to do laundry today. Yuck.
In other matters - Glee was SO amazing last night. [Gleek alert - show nerdiness discussion coming up!] I got teary at the part when Kurt's dad threw Finn out of the house because he was describing Kurt's stuff as "faggy" and yelling at him/being cruel. I just loved how they turned stereotype around and made Kurt's dad a blue collar worker and yet he is vehemently championing his son and saying that Finn can't use that word or talk that way. It was such a powerful scene. My mom and I agreed that it should be used as a teaching exercise to try to convey to people how ugly and hurtful that word is. Go Glee!
Wellllll I better get started on my homework. Have a good week!
2010 Relay for Life - donate please!
Sam's Charity: Water birthday campaign - check it out!
My mom passed on the link to a hilarious website! It's called "Shit my Kids Ruined", where each post is a submission by a parent with a picture/accompanying blurb on an object that their child has destroyed. There are some pretty funny ones. I'll put the link at the bottom of this post - if you want a laugh, go there. ;)
Three weeks from today is my last day of my freshman year of college! Tonight is also the finale for season six of The Office, on NBC at 9 PM.
Have a good weekend!
Shit my Kids Ruined
Sam's Charity: Water campaign
2010 Relay for Life team
I'd like to begin this post by pointing out the quote on top of the page that's been generated, because it's one of my favorites:
"People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use." - Kierkegaard
I just love something about that quote. People can be so stupid.
Anyway, it looked like Massive Braincase was down for a few days. I've been trying to get to it and it hasn't been working, but it is now! I'm assuming Timm looked at it or something, in which case - thanks Timm!
Welllll I'm rapidly approaching the end of my first year of college! My last day is June 10th, which is three weeks from tomorrow, Thursday! Yay! However, I actually counted the days I'll have to do anything school-related. I have Saturdays, Sundays, and Thursdays off, and during finals week I have a final for three days of that week and I'm done. Also, I have Memorial Day off, obviously. So, this brings the official tally of the number of actual school days I have left to....*drumroll*...12! Only TWELVE days left where I have to do anything school-related! I'm so freaking excited, in case you couldn't already tell. I'm hoping time goes by really quickly. Luckily, I'm done with all tests/assignments until finals so I'm pretty much just doing my reading/coasting until dead week (the week before finals). Time has seemed to drag, but when I look back over this first year it's gone by really quickly. I can't believe I'm already almost a sophomore in college! I hope the whole process goes this quickly, seeing as how I've never been a fan of school at all.
In other news - James' birthday is in 3 days, this Saturday on the 22nd of May. We are still planning to go across the Canadian border and we've made a reservation in Vancouver for dinner. He's also decided he wants to get a tattoo. He wants to get a black heart tattooed on his forearm. Isn't that cool? He says it's because he wears his heart on his sleeve. That's my mom's birthday present to him.
So I went and read ALL of my dad's twitters yesterday. It took quite awhile, as he had about 4000. But, it was worth it. When I was reading them I could hear his voice/remember his voice so clearly it was like he never left us. It makes the memory of him even more vivid when I read things that he wrote himself. That's why I love going back and reading his blogs as well. I sure do miss him a ridiculous amount. However, when I read things that he wrote it eases the knot in my chest a little tiny bit. It's like he's here again when I read them.
I know I ask enough favors of all of you, and I'm afraid I'm about to ask another one: please keep your eyes open for jobs/let me know about any you hear of! James and I DESPERATELY need jobs over the summer. We have a lot we're going to start paying for and it'd be nice to not go into horrible debt. We both want to work full-time. If you can think of anything, or you hear of anything, please let me know. Any crappy job, whatever. We just needs jobs.
And, as always, I want to remind you about Relay for Life and Charity: Water.
Our Relay for Life team this year, organized completely by the amazing/lovely Alex Peterson, can always use more members or donations. Relay for Life is on June 11-12th this year, and any help would be greatly appreciated. The link to the Relay for Life team is:
http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR?pg=team&fr_id=21967&team_id=724953
And, my friend Sam's Charity: Water campaign is very active, and has already raised over $400. Her goal is $5000 to build an entire well! This a very nice thing to do and anything helps. Donations are obviously most appreciated but passing on the word is good too. To learn more about her Charity: Water campaign, just check out my blog a couple posts down called "Charity: Water". It will be open for donations until July 27th. Here is the link to her campaign:
http://mycharitywater.org/p/campaign?campaign_id=4488
Have a great week you guys, happy humpday, and don't forget to wish James a very happy birthday this Saturday!
I'm getting so anxious for the end of school. Luckily, it's coming up very fast. My last day is June 10th, i.e. exactly five weeks from tomorrow (Thursday)! And that last week is finals week, so I don't have classes. So I only have four weeks left of actual learning, thank God. Also I'm keeping busy enough to make it go even faster.
Next weekend (May 14th-16th) we'll be home for the weekend, and we're bringing a lot of stuff home so my mom isn't overwhelmed when she comes to pick up our stuff the weekend before school ends. Then the weekend after that is James' birthday! He's turning 19, so we're planning to go across the border to Canada for the day and he's gonna get his very first drink at a restaurant. But don't worry - he'll only have one because he'll be the one driving us. Then after his birthday there's only three weeks left until we can go home for good!
My mom is coming up to my school the weekend before we come home to take pretty much all of our stuff back. The only things we're keeping here are our essentials: toiletries, some clothes, and our laptops/study materials. Hopefully we'll be too busy studying for finals to be too bored without all of our electronics. We would bring it all back ourself the day we move back except that his car is WAY too small. There's no way we'd fit everything, so she's coming up to take everything back that we can't fit. Also, there's another reason why we don't want to have a big moving day the Thursday we go home - my cousins are graduating high school that day! So we are driving back and pretty much heading straight for the Tacoma Dome as soon as we get home to go to their graduation, so we don't have time for a big move.
Then, two days later we leave for Disneyland with my mom and sister! How awesome is June going to be? I'm already counting down the days until school is out and we leave for Disneyland. Yes, literally - I have a couple of countdown clocks on my phone. I'm getting so anxious for everything to end - it's summeritis already!
In other news, it turns out I am going to be participating on a Relay for Life team. A lovely family friend named Alex started her own team and has taken over running it, bless her. We have almost a complete official team. I'm so thankful to her - she is organizing and raising money and making it possible for me to participate without having to be stressed/be there all day. Please join and/or donate! The link to the team page is:
http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR?pg=team&fr_id=21967&team_id=724953
I can't wait for June. I'm determined to make this summer as awesome as last summer. A challenge because I got to go to London. Easy because my dad had just died and I had to get my wisdom teeth pulled. We'll see how this works out!
Also, in another very important note, Sam's birthday charity is up and running and getting donations! It'd be so awesome if you guys could donate or at least spread the word because it's such an amazing cause/gesture. Even a small donation helps those who have so little. The link to her Charity: Water campaign is:
http://mycharitywater.org/p/campaign?campaign_id=4488
For a full explanation of what her birthday campaign is all about, see my post called "Charity: Water - please read!". It's the post right before this one. If you have any questions feel free to email me, Facebook me, Twitter me, or email her!
So what's up with you guys?
So I was blown away by my friend's extreme selflessness and I know you will be too.
Sam is turning 21 this July - obviously a big birthday here in the United States. But, rather than going to a bar or getting gifts, she opted to "give up" her birthday for a Charity: Water campaign! Charity: Water is an amazing non-profit organization that collects donations to provide clean water for people in Africa that have never had it before. Can you imagine that? These poor people have to walk for hours to get to water that isn't even clean. Not only that - once they get to their destination, a lot of the people are assaulted - or they die from drinking the dirty water. We all have been blessed with clean water our entire lives - we have enough to waste! It's important that we try to help those who are less fortunate.
Now, I know you don't know her, but I think her kindness and generosity should speak to all of us anyway! :) She created a campaign on Charity: Water - it is 100% legitimate. Neither she nor the organization will profit in any way from any donation you make. It will ALL go towards helping these people get clean water. Just $20 can help give one person clean water for 20 YEARS. It is definitely worth it.
And one of the best parts is, the campaign lasts for three months. It launched today and it will go two days past her birthday at the end of July, so there is plenty of time to donate. If you don't have the money now, you can save some until the campaign gets closer to ending and donate it then. It's a total win-win situation.
Her goal is $5000, enough to build an entire well for a village so they don't have to go far at all for clean, healthy water. If we all help her reach this goal, we will have been part of an amazing effort to give an entire village of unfortunate people clean water. Definitely worth at least $20! But, even $1 helps. ANY donation is generous and wonderful.
But, if you don't want to donate, at least pass the word along. She can't reach this goal alone - she needs a lot of people to help her. I will be posting reminders on Facebook and Twitter about once a week until the end of the campaign. if they annoy you, try to ignore them and remember that it's for a great cause.
Please donate, or at least pass this on!
The link is:
http://mycharitywater.org/p/campaign?campaign_id=4488
Thanks you guys!
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